Sunday, November 6, 2011


I think I was complaining about skin tags when last I wrote. That was the night of insomniac musings about my sex life (or lack there of). The skin tags are benign, but annoying depending on location. The bigger ones seem to develop in areas with lots of traffic. Like the bra zone and inner thighs. This allows the little buggars to become red and angry and be painful. The ones I hate the most are the ones that get caught under the under wire of my bra. Never fails to annoy in public. I feel the need to point out here that there is just one letter's difference in public and pubic. Why, I wonder; since pubic should not be public.

Speaking of public ...... my husband thinks these writings are too racy to be public. It is almost like the man does not even know me. I talk like this all the time, but put it down on paper (or cyberspace) and he gets all prudish. I am not sharing any intimate details, despite the blog title. I was sleep deprived when I chose it.

But, the skin tags ..... In case you are fortunate enough to be unfamiliar with these; they are unsightly little flaps of skin that hang from various places on your body. I have a friend who will actually shave hers off with a very sharp razor. I have been unable to bring myself to do this, having had a traumatic leg shaving event in my youth. I have found that tying a length of dental floss around the base of the tag itself will cut off blood supply and it will eventually fall off. It will fall off quicker if you put wart remover on it. If the skin tag is in your armpit area, good luck trying to tie anything around it yourself. You will, at that point have to ignore your vanity and ask your husband to assist you. Mine will tie things, but will not cut or shave them for me. Wuss.

Sometimes, if you are really lucky, the tag will fall off ....... no, really, that is wrong......... you will accidentally rip it off when removing your under garments. It may smart a little, but the relief that it is gone will overcome this.

But, when I started writing this today, I was annoyed with the hair on my head. I have always been prone to oily, fine, limp hair. The one thing I was looking forward to when my hair started to gray was that my scalp would start to dry out. But, no, my hair still has to be washed on a daily basis to have any body whatsoever. Did the texture change? No, still fine and limp. Is this fair? No, the one side effect of aging that I wanted to happen .......... didn't!

I suppose that this blog is more about aging than sex. At sixty, though, it is all a whole lot of talk, anyway.


  1. What makes me soooo happy is having hotflashes AND occasional zits. Acne and menopause? What's with that?

    You are so right about the "traffic zones" and those pesky skin tags.

    Don't let your husband make you veer off your quirky, sassy and sharp path. If he continues, tell him, "I'll Fargo you!" (Do you need to borrow my wood chipper?)

  2. Well the trick is keep it racy but vague. Lots of innuendo and enough details to just raise the blood pressure 5 mm.

    I wrote a book 20 years ago and did nothing with it. I was just completely fascinated with sex with my wife, still am, in fact I don't think I ever fully recovered from the wonder of hearing those wild stories about the dirty games grown ups play when I was a child. "Yeah, the man takes off all his clothes, then the lady takes off all hers. Then they kiss and hug. Then the man sticks his thing in the ladies thing. And then he farts." There you have it. "Bird and Bees Street Edition" 1958. In 1959 I got a book. "All About the Human Body" I wasn't allowed to read the last chapter. Hmmmm, Guess what chapter I read first. HOLY MACKERAL! IT'S TRUE! IT'S WHERE BABIES COME FROM. This was big stuff. It was like learning the Earth is not flat and I was the expert. Like Master and Johnson I explained human sexuality to wide eyed and frightened 8 to 12 year olds. I even threw in some scientific terms, sperm, chromosones.

    Anyhow I diverge from my tale. So 20 years ago I endeavored to write about my wife and my sexual experiences in just one chapter. It is not for the novice writer. First what terminology:

    Clinical: I engaged in coitus with her. Hmmmm.

    Old Romance Novel: My presence sought her gift. Hmmmm, hmmmm.

    New Romance Novel: As my turgid purply manhood, slid into her feminine depths, she gasped and felt the blood rush to her head. "Oh Sextant, take me you brute." Hmmmm Hmmm Hmmm.

    Locker Room: I $&#*@% her brains out and she rose to the ceiling screaming for more.

    Well lets put it this way. We do the standard things that men and women do and we really enjoy it. To give specifics seems to sully something that is quite beautiful and spiritual. I tried to capture the beauty and fascination and it come off sounding like a third rate erotic novel. One of my favorite writers Richard Rhodes, wrote a book called "Making Love". It was a graphic description of his sexual experiences. I think he meant for it to be beautiful literature and it just come off as literary porn. It was terrible. I felt like a voyeur reading it. Best to leave that stuff to fictional accounts.

    I get into sexuality every now and again at my blog. I think what breaks my heart is that sex has become so devalued among the young. Drunken hookups, young girls and the oral sex thing, the bimbo culture. To me sex is Holy and should be a Sacrament of love, with just a slight bit of off color humor to make it interesting. But to the young, it is something you do drunk and then put a star on a name on your Facebook account. A sad misuse of one of our gifts from God.

  3. Sioux, ah yes the acne and hot flashes will often combine to make one put on a public display of hostility to the world at large. I think that maybe my acne has settled in my scalp ....... hence the oily hair.

    Sextant, I know exactly what you mean. Sex always looks a little tawdry in print.

    When I started this blog I was in a sleep deprived haze. I have three other blogs and don't know what I was thinking!! Maybe I wasn't thinking at all. Sleep deprivation is still a very big part of my life. If I manage five hours of uninterrupted sleep, it is cause for celebration. Naps are not an option. The kampground gets in the way. Even if I post a sign on the door and pretend I am not here, those pesky kampers will hunt me down for that elusive bag of ice .......

  4. Every so often, I just pop into my GP and he freezes/lasers off all these unsightly things - especially the age marks on my hands. Getting old - not for sissies.

  5. Ho, ho, - Sextant and I follow so many of the same blogs - although he manages daily far more than I do. Hope he misses this comment though re 'hair'. Have you found that your pubic hairs are getting less and less? I have - very depressing. Yet another sign that Nature thinks we don't need to be sexually attractive any more. I tried testosterone implants a few times. No effect really - not even any signs of chin hair. I would rather have had a stronger dose and chin hairs (Sigh - still adore my husband. Wish the hormone levels had kept up with the level of mental feelings). Naturally, I am too shy to ask him if he has noticed the pubic hair thing....

  6. NB - do you still pick up comments almost a year later?